Time and Tide.

note: this really must be pms. when this routine started, i was amazed by how we still try to see each other even for just a short time. at least, we get to see each other. now, my expectations are climbing up the charts again. well, not really. those short time (s) take up our rest time (s) that we get sick na rin. so what is there to be thankful for? now this is REALLY PMS.

Nov 26
Ry - go out with college friends
Pom - work

Nov 27
am
Pom - go out with officemates
Ry - will TRY to do shopping. i dont like hassles during xmas kasi eh. i hate buying gifts as well. but i have to. and it's time that i have to try to learn. only once in my life i enjoyed shopping for xmas. it was with a friend. we started shopping around 9 then we ended around 3pm. around this time, Pom will be deadtired. and even if he tells me that we cant go shopping yet coz it's not sweldo time for him, this free time shall never happen whether or not payday has come. it's like being single again. afternoons will be handled by moi. goodbye to the dream of having someone to hold hands with while walking in the malls. for a movie lover, I have only watched two movies with him. no change even when i was single. BUT he needs his rest and now im complaining already. DAMN these mood swings.
- will try to find suppliers of baskets.
- will watch a movie (im not going to watch a movie tonight anymore)
pm
Pom & Ry - go to bernie's for the farewell party...sleep (puyatan na naman!).

Saturday Nights: i was used to sleeping early or going out late with friends. aposento was the place. eisen was my partner. Pom was my kulitan partner at home. now, saturday nights are not even intimate. always at parties.(okay. o.a. lang ako.) and we both keep on yawning.
sometimes, id want to go out on saturday nights but this is the only time we can be together..longer....

Nov 28
am
Pom - sleep
Ry - attend mass
- hopefully do some chores and gift wrap if there is anything to wrap
- meeting with some clients (wedding) but this meeting is not sure yet.
- willl TRY to do some shopping again.
pm
Pom - family time
Ry - sleeping time

okay... i shall not continue anymore. this is just a masochistic way of epitomizing my mood swings. bottomline, i miss him.
really, my mom has this way of making me feel cheap. now i question my boyfriend why i have to "stretch" and be the one to meet up with him for breakfast just because i wont be able to see him in the pm. that short 30 mins of saying hi, hello, eating, and then goodbye was okay with me. id complain to him pa nga that i always see him already. now my mom....there she goes again with her opinion "dont show him too much".
ayos. tang ina. note: this can be ignored if you are a close friend. you know very well that this is just one of those days. but i shall not realize that yet. schizobitch.

but what if my prediction is right? my time, your time? party time? quality time? rest time? play time? recuperation time? time of the month? NO MORE TIME. one day, we will both be tired. (p-e-s-s-i-m-i-s-t-i-c)

Oh their goodness!

This is an activity I shall be doing to remind myself that life is really good and that the bad things that happen will just be followed by a “duh?!”, a question mark. Let me start with good things in my relationship. Note: happiness is a decision. If I dwell on the bad and not even acknowledge my learning, then I will not grow nor gain any wisdom. When we are overwhelmed with grief or sadness, all happiness is erased, as if the world or God or nature has been unfair all along. I have overcome that state when I have realized what a beautiful world this is and much more when I realized that the world’s beauty is nothing compared to the promise of heaven. And now that I am in an entirely new dimension of growth, specifically the dimension of relationships, I would want to remember the good. Practically speaking, if there will be a time that I will think about letting go or giving up, I shall go back to this piece and the other pieces I shall be making and then decide. Because in those times when we are in the hands of weakness, that certain weakness that breaks the bonds of relationships, that specific “I give up”, the only thing we can cling to is goodness, that specific gift of love which makes us loyal to the covenant God has imparted.

Pom…..
1. has courted me traditionally
2. visits me in the house
3. makes me laugh (super di obvious since people think im the noisy one.)
4. washed, waxed, and vacuumed my car when I got sick
5. has tried to overcome his “family alienation syndrome” when he introduced me to his family and when he invited me to eat dinner in his house (though not with his family). This is still an issue but I do hope he will get over this as I would really like to “not feel uncomfortable” around the Valinos.
6. gave me flowers when he proposed to me
7. gave me flowers when I cried because of work problems (first time that I cried because of work). Gist: I went home and there were flowers on my bed. The message read “ Cheer up hun. I shall see you later.”
8. gave me flowers when I felt so bad that I was not able to eat dinner with him because of work. I knew he felt bad as well since he had to wake up early just so he can have dinner with me before going to work.(graveyard shift sha)
9. Got my license
10. fetched me in tagaytay right after his work (6am from makati til 8am in tagaytay travel time. Imagine how high his drowse levels must be!). Saw him smiling as he gave me flowers (4th time) and said “good morning!”
11. gave a magnificent breakfast treat at breakfast@antonio’s in tagaytay
12. and I went to tagaytay together in one of those weekends that I really needed some fresh air and rejuvenation (damn my office life!)
13. gives the best kiss
14. gives the best hug.. (I shall stop describing any physical intimacies already..hehe)
15. can be left alone with my friends
16. tells me I am beautiful even if I look fat, mufasa-like, and even if I have just gotten up from a forced wake up call in the morning. (pom, if you are reading this, this does not excuse you for pinching my bilbil noh!)
17. tells me he loves me so much in the wee hours of the morning
18. surprised me with a midnight “hello” call. And “you’re still sleeping” call at 7:45 am today
19. gave me his bronze pilot wings
20. writes beautiful letters
21. shared with me security access codes
22. shared with me his concerns in looking for a job
23. is patient with my moodswings that are translated to a monthly, “break na tayo!” brought about by my period..hehe..
24. hates crying ladies..but tries to be understanding towards my waves of sadness
25. exchanged a blissful tagaytay gimmik with his officemates for a promise of a dinner treat with me..


Back to work muna..pampakilig lang